Day 7 I'm Not a Fan of Monday's

This morning came as a not-so-gentle reminder that I have to return to work for another Monday! These days really are the worst, especially after such a pleasant family-oriented weekend. As per usual, I woke up late, tried my best to throw me together and ran out the door. I tried to be productive at work, as work got a little crazy. Fed up with the rudeness of some people, Janet quit this morning and work became that much more hectic and gossipy. I went home at lunch to fold the massive pile of your laundry that had accumulated on the floor of our bedroom, and then tried to push, pull, squeeze and squash it into whatever drawer I could find.

I changed the sheets and made the bed and headed back to my Monday afternoon reminding myself that I had dinner with Dad tonight and could relax! I mosied to Dads at four, collected Liam, did some quilting at home and made it back to Dad's house around 5:30 for our "last meal!" We always joke, that if we were on death row, and had only one meal left in life, that we would unanimously decide on Mac-n-cheese and Beans and hotdogs as Dad makes them.

It was soooo yummy and I ate WAY too much. After my terrible Monday, I was craving serious comfort food and this was just the thing. Let's not even talk about the delicious Chocolate Chip Cookies K made for dessert. Dad and I shared an entire bottle of Pinot Noir, we had great conversation and I left feeling full and happy (perhaps a little over full and therefore a little less than perfectly happy)!

When Liam and I made it home, I plugged my phone in because it had gotten quite low, and out to the living room for more quilting I ventured. I must have really been preoccupied because before I knew it, it was 8:30 and I was rushing to get Liam to bed. As I left his room, I remembered my phone charging in the other room and made it just in time to see various missed calls, plenty of text messages and my mother writing "Here!" Seems she was overly concerned about my lack of communication and was stopping by to ensure I was still alive.

I allowed her to get Liam out of bed, as I had just put him in there and he was wide awake. She stayed for a little as I rushed her out because I was missing seeing my favorite face! I have been turning the fireplace on the last few days. It is starting to get cold. Fall makes me miss you sooo much. I can't wait to share all fall has to offer with you!

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 6 A Cleaning Day

Dare I say, today was much like yesterday. Except, instead of creating a disaster throughout the entire house, I put it back together. I finally disbursed the fall decorations around the house. Cleaned the kitchen, did dishes, put together the dining room, picked up the disastrous living room, organized Liam's bedroom and put away some of the clean laundry. I cannot say that Liam followed suit. This morning, he forgot he wasn't wearing a diaper and peed and pooped his pants. There were "nuggets" all over his bedroom and all over himself. Oy vey, what a mess! I cleaned him up and got him changed for lunch.

Mom and Bry Bry came over and we had hotdogs and Ramen noodles (yum)! Liam quickly confessed to this morning's deed by proclaiming over lunch, "Nina, I was a bad boy, I pooped EVERYWHERE!" Oh Liam! I put him down for a nap around two and quilted while I watched Pride and Prejudice. I believe this is currently my favorite love story. The love in the movie is so raw and not influenced by outside factors or modern day novelties. It made me miss you even more!

After dinner, Liam and I went outside to play on the swing set and run around the yard. I was feeling slightly guilty for not getting him outside all weekend. It was cold and rainy so he wasn't missing much but I thought a little fresh air might be nice anyway.

The Blind Side was on TV so I spent the rest of the night (you guessed it) in tears watching and ironing the quilt pieces. I have a feeling you will like it when I am working on a quilt project. I get very engrossed in watching TV and movies, which is so typically not like me.

This morning you posted this to my wall:

Never Have I Fallen

Your lips speak soft sweetness,
Your touch a cool caress.
I am lost in your magic,
My heart beats within your chest.

I think of you each morning,
And dream of you each night.
I think of your arms being around me,
And cannot express my delight.

Never have I fallen,
But I am quickly on my way.
You hold a heart in your hands,
That has never before been given away.

- Rex A. Williams

It is so beautiful hun! I consider myself so blessed to have been given the honor of guarding, holding, loving and cherishing your heart. Fear not, you are in safe hands my love!

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 5 What We Will Be

My days at home with Liam are some of my favorite days. We lounge around in comfy clothes, do things I LOVE like crafting, text you intermittently, and love each other like crazy! I think too many parents don't take the time to really enjoy and love their children. We get so busy and wrapped up in life that we forget to appreciate the simple, everyday, mundane moments, like these.

I was feeling exceptionally crafty and thrifty today so I decided to dye your old socks. You did WHAT, you ask? I dyed your socks. The aim was red, orange, and green. The outcome; pink, orange and yellowish-green. Mneh, it'll work! It was a really cool process and I had a ton of fun doing it. Mom came over while I was stirring them in large pots of dye and laughed. The house was a disaster, there was clean laundry strewn all about, and movies on both TV's in the house playing simultaneously. All of that mess, coupled with me in my rubber gloves, it was certainly a sight to see.

After she left, Liam and I cuddled up for a nap, I talked with you on the phone, put together some fabric for Rag Rugs and decided on an early bed time. Overall it was about as perfect as a day can be without you here.

We watched The Lorax:
Ted: "The last seed?"
Once-ler "It's not about what it is. It's about what it can become."

Often times, people will make remarks to me, that although it's not as though they are suggesting we are moving too quickly, it is as if they are silently judging our happiness and decisions. I firmly believe that when things are right you know in your heart that they are, and commitment and happiness are finally within reach. I think the quote above perfectly describes this. I think too often people are looking at what we are, how long we have known each other, what the situation currently is. I don't look at it that way. I rarely spend my time dwelling on the past or rifling through it to find answers. Instead, I concentrate on the future and the present. On what we currently are and will be. I look at what we will become and I am that much more content with our lives. I hope when you look at us, you see what we can become too because it is such an amazing sight to see!

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 4 Super Liam Saves the Day

My God, that boy is stubborn, especially for pictures. It probably doesn't help that I subject him to thousands on a monthly basis. I just can't help but capture those adorable curls!

Today is FRIDAY!!! Which means very little when you have no one fabulous at home (other than Liam of course) to spend your weekend off with. I made the best of it, woke up missing you and plowed through my day.

I snuck to the bank at lunch to cash out the change from your house. I ran home to do dishes, pick up the house and rushed back in time for a little productivity. Four o'clock came and I was soooo excited to get out of work. I picked up Liam, ran home to squeeze some quilting in, and then met Dad at Ponderosa for dinner. We had a really good time. I really enjoy talking with K and Dad about you. I love how much everyone in my family approves of you, of us; it gives me a peace I have been searching for a long time to find.

Liam and I slowly ventured to Walmart to do some light shopping. Liam desperately needed some new sneakers (his feet grow like weeds) and some new socks (I can never find the color I want). I probably took a little too long looking in all of the isles for deals and bargains because sure enough, just as we are checking out, the little voice I've been listening to says, "Mommy, I have to pee!"

HELP ME!!! Wait... Enter Nicole Bailey. I cannot tell you how happy I was in that exact moment! I am (for all intents and purposes) a "single" mother. Although not currently single and hopefully never again, I think the name implies I watch the children (or child) by myself, alone and on occasion (by God's grace) with the help of family. Most of the time, I proclaim my single motherhood with pride and reverence. "I am a single mother!" I say! And other days, I cower in the corner while Liam destroys the house, I rush through the shower leaving soap all over my body as Liam calls to me from the other room, and I scrub food particles out of places I didn't know food could be while muttering expletives under my breath. Ask your Momma, this job ain't easy! And today with a cart full of groceries, a purse and a two year-old with a full bladder, I thank my lucky stars for fast reliable friends!

Although I'm sure to her this seemed like nothing, watching someones cart while they took their child to the bathroom. Without her, I likely would have ended up with pee everywhere, no groceries and possibly no purse. But there she was, beautifully smiley, eager to help, and pleasant as punch! Liam typically runs around the house chanting, "Super Liam Saves the Day!" while punching his fist into the air! Today, I think Nicole was pretty Super!

I eventually made it home in time for Nina and Papa to come over for some pizza, then bed for Liam, and quilting for me. I popped Pretty Woman into the DVD player while I sewed, cut, and ironed to my content. I was up until sometime after two in the morning.

A quote from Pretty Woman:
Edward: "So what happens after he climbs up and rescues her?"
Vivian: "She rescues him right back."

You say all the time how I rescued you from everything, well you should know... you rescued me too!

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 3 I'm a Quilting Queen

Your Momma is seriously silly, I LOVE IT! All I thought about today, other than you, was QUILTING! I was so excited to sneak home at lunch and work on the quilt, I cannot wait to show you the finished piece, it will be gorgeous! I don't know why I ever went in to accounting, this is obviously what makes me tick. It is probably a lot like fishing, gardening and hunting; it's great fun, but it does little for bills and my bills aren't little.

Either way, I had a very productive day. I did 8 loads of laundry (which currently needs to be put away) and sorted through your change from only the kitchen. It will likely make a large dent in some of the kitchen renovations $123.14 of change is nothing to cough at, and there seems to be plenty more throughout your house.

Everything is quiet here. I'm trying to find my routine and missing you like crazy.

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 2 Today was a Little Harder

Today was not the cakewalk of yesterday. Mostly because you're not here and there is no temporary replacement for a Jeffery. That aside, work was long and seemed to crawl as I finally approached Angleberger time. I really love visiting with your family. We spent well over an hour discussing my favorite person, as I tried to plan in my head how to tackle the ever-growing list that is accumulating of things that need to be done when you return.

I spent last night throwing more of your "life" into boxes and bringing it to our house. I do love cleaning, unpacking and finding places for all of our various "stuff". You will have a lot of items to sort through when you return, I cannot fathom why any man would have as much as you do but I'm happy to help. I am so excited to fix up the house a little to be rented and to take some time to really make it look nice.

Your Momma reminded me of Jenn's baby shower and suggested a quilt for the occasion. I absolutely love making quilts so I jumped on it immediately until... she said camo! I firmly believe camo is NOT a color! Lol, we both know how much I hate camo! Don't worry, I'm doing a classy rendition! ;)

I left there and headed straight for Nina's! We visited for half an hour then shot home for bedtime and for me to begin my quilting extravaganza! (I only have a week and a half and I may be overdoing it!) I was up until nearly one... we had a storm of the year. Fires all across Potsdam, flooding, power outages and my road was lined with vehicles until sometime after midnight. There was apparently a fire in the brush a few poles down. Thank goodness for your scanner.

I really miss you babes.

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!

Day 1 The Most Amazing Month of my Life

Hun, I had the MOST amazing time this month EVER! I love being with you, I love being near you, I love everything about you and I'm so glad you're mine!

Today was much easier than I anticipated, I was sad, I did some crying, but I feel like a pro! Everything will be ok, I know this now, I have no doubts and I'm ok. I know this will be hard, I know I will struggle here or there when life throws me a curve, but I know everything emotional will subside and again soon you'll have your arms wrapped around me.

I drove back into Potsdam and headed straight for our house. I quickly devoured your mother's Death by Chocolate Cake, Karen's Oatmeal Raisin Cookies and my Banana Bread. I reasoned that this was as healthy a lunch as I was going to consume, thanked God for comfort food, grabbed some boxes to pack up things from your house and to work I ventured.

I tried to remind myself of all of the wonderful things we did while you were home; the weddings, the wine, the movies, the gardening, the dinners, the cooking, the baking, the shopping, the affection, the golf, the mini-golf and the love.

"Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire." -Francois de La Rochefoucauld

I have no doubts that this hitch will not only fan the flame I have for you but will continue to ever increase our love as the days continue into months...

And Jeffery, I Blue Heart love you!